Last year in April, I had my chance to see the world of Touhou. U.F.O. was just released a month before, so I really didn't have anything to look forward to except Zun's side project which would be another few months down the road. Back then, it wasn't a big deal, but now that I look back, I kind of spoiled myself too much by allowing myself to play all 12 games in such a short period of time. So the whole "new" feel kind of was gone. Then Zun came out in February, and said "Behold! I bring you . . carrots!!! Oh, and the demo of TH13 will be out in a couple weeks." Little did he know that those two weeks would never come. Just not even a full 24 hours away from its release, Japan had its earthquake, and everything was halted. Only to be released a week and a half later.
Fast forward to just 30 hours ago, and he would give the whole world this;
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| A girl on a boat!!! |
This was my first ever authentic play of a new Touhou in its numerical order. I screamed, laughed, screamed some more, laughed even harder, taping my jaw shut so it wouldn't drop again, have another great laugh, and then raged. Yeah, Its a love hate relationship. So, with it all said and done, not even 12 hours later, normal was beaten, and I had my celebration.
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| Weeee |
A taniki . . . . a friggen . . . TANUKI! Now, I've seen a lot of awesome things in my life, BUT A TANUKI!!! My, my, my, Zun needs to be hugged and raped for such a wonderful thing. And if you guys are unaware of what a tanuki even is . . .
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| I think it says it all |
And I am so urked at myself! This friggen character is not only hard, but she has legions of animals! People . . or gingerbread people come and shoot bullets at you. Dog come out and bite you, step on you, and whip their tail in so many violent ways. Birds that dive bomb you. (Like we haven't heard that one before.) And frogs that explode, leaving a trail of bullets! Go look it up! I know you guys are laughing, but this crap is real! Its going to try and kill you. @.@ I think what makes it funny is; I could had said this a week ago, and not a single bit of it would make as much sense as it does now without sounding totally far fetched.
So, yeah, I still can't beat her. T.T But hopefully that will change, and with enough sleep, she can finally be raped. Its not as hard as U.F.O mind you. Cause holy . .! That was impossible. Nuu is a sick twisted soul that's needs a frying pan to the head a few gajillion times. I presonally never seen a U.F.O in my life, but if I did, it better not do half the things Nuu made it do to the player! So... much... rape. No amount of therapy will ever make it okay. Take a nail file, and saw it pretty far into your skin. Then leave a blow dryer on it on high in your exposed skin while raw Mercury is pouring on it. That almost feels pretty good compared to the mental pain I've been through with Nuu. And I haven't even gone against Marisa. Oh, geez.... there are times I swear impossible level designs will be the death of me.
In the end, the game delivered a lot of new elements to the danmaku world. While this was a step for a way for it to stand out, it was also a huge gamble. One in which I am happy to say it succeeded, and then some. U.F.O. characters, and couple Perfect Cherry Blossom characters, bone arrows, a girl on a boat, gingerbread man, foxes/dogs, birds, and frogs, (oh my) and a friggen tanuki! This game wins. Go play it right now! I'll be buying this game offline here in a couple days, and actually own the disc copy. As I leave you, I will show you my short spell card video. I'll upload a full playthrough of it later today. Enjoy, and Zun, I tip my hat off to you . . . If I had a hat that is.
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